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Struggling with ADHD by Mlee Kingdom

25/10/2021
Juanita Beaudry

I had always struggled with my ADHD, and I would say that as an adult with ADHD there are many more difficulties that are often overlooked. I struggle personally with executive dysfunction. The struggle is often with daily tasks that I see others experience seamlessly. I can’t tell you how many times I have forgotten my wallet, phone, or keys. 

The things that I find helpful now are lists most definitely. There are other resources I use such as my close friends or a family member that I trust that I can be accountable to. I find that I struggle with accountability as well. I find that when I have someone else being a part of what I am doing that it becomes easier to complete tasks than when I am forced to do it on my own as I know at that point that it won’t get done in time or sometimes at all. Then the guilt sets in! I feel guilty when I don’t complete a task on time or at all and I will think about it most of the time and it will take up a lot of space in my mind until I break down. Honestly, sometimes I wish I was neurotypical as that would at least allow me to complete things on time!

Coming from my mother having difficulty with me in high school as I didn’t acknowledge that I was different. I feel like I fought the rigidity of doing school like everyone else.  I was the daydreamer in school, and I still find peace when I zone out as an adult. Though I don’t think there is really anything wrong with zoning out, granted it probably wouldn’t make much sense to do in the middle of a business meeting… I think it helps somewhat reset my brain.

I know that I am very intelligent, I know this. I just really struggle with applying myself. I know what I must do, I just can’t get my body to move or engage myself enough in the task to get it done. I think therefore I enjoy delegating and being a manager because I have loved building a team and building people up rather than being responsible for manufacturing items or writing etc. I love being around people. I love being a leader. I know I am meant to be an entrepreneur.

I think there is definitely a need for the community around ADHD and I think groups are a great way to feel seen and accepted. I think there is something to be said for medication too, although I haven’t investigated this too much over the years as I struggle with stimulants. I think what works for each person varies and trial and error is an important part too. Don’t be too hard on yourself. 

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